she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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