it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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