I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
Just fell off a train. Bad.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
