we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
