I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
Randomize
