If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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