I'm really into asian looking animals
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
