how can u be prego again
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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