so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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