What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
