the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
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