she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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