So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Randomize
