Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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