I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
I thought turtle was a code word for weed until he pulled out a baby turtle from his pocket and said "$20 for a turtle"
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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