maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
