have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
