could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
it was like eating out sand paper
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
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