I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
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