i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
