their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
