I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
