He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
Randomize
