Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Found the puke drawer
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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