New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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