So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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