Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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