i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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