My liver just broke up with me...
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize