Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
