I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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