He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize