oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Randomize
