She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
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