her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I have fence marks all over my body
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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