Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
did i just pee glitter
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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