Where did you get a picture of my penis
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize