Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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