I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize