I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
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