Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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