this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
