Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
