Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
