Little spoons don't ask big questions
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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