We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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