And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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