I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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