god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
