her vagine was all disorganized.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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