So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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